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On July 12, 1980 I bought a book that deeply influenced my life.

Sad to say, with as many books as I buy, very few move me. Very few are hypnotic. In my 52 years, maybe two dozen or so have awakened something new in me. That doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy reading the books; it just means few of them alter the course of my life.

The one I read in 1980 is still around today. At first glance you’ll wonder what it has to do with James Caan or me or much else in the “real” world. But stay with me on this.

The book is Improv: Improvisation and the Theatre. It’s by Keith Johnstone. (I told you it wouldn’t make immediate sense to you.)

I was in the theatre back then — I wrote a one-act play that won an award and production back in 1979 (see PS below) — so reading the book wasn’t out of the norm for me, but I never expected the book Improv to open my eyes to life, as well.

One of the most powerful concepts in the book is the idea of status. There’s an entire chapter on it in Johnstone’s work.

In short, in every situation there is an unseen and unconscious play of status.

One person is perceived as higher and the other is perceived as lower. This happens virtually all the time. When you start to become aware of it, you’ll see it everywhere.

You can also use this to your advantage. When you intentionally lower your status, others will like you, feel comfortable around you, and want to spend more time with you. They feel safe. They feel important. They feel respected.

I know a famous speaker who confided in me that this secret method was how he won friends and became so popular. He always made himself appear lower in status.

As you know by now, I got to meet superstar actor James Caan the other day in LA and spend some time with him.

I love Caan as an actor. He’s been in such classic movies as Rollerball and of course The Godfather. But I really admired him as a person when we were in his trailer on the studio lot of the Las Vegas TV show and he asked my opinion about a new reality-TV show he’s currently involved in.

He asked…and he listened.

And on top of that, he did some brainstorming with me, showing that my opinion counted.

I disagreed with him about something he was doing to market the reality show, and he didn’t argue. He heard me out. He told me his view. I told him mine. We had a discussion.

When you consider that I’m a nobody in his world and he’s a diety in the movie and television world, the fact that we had any discussion is amazing.

In short, Caan lowered his status to let little ole me feel more at home in his neon-lit world. This was a major feat, and something I will never forget.

I have no idea if James Caan did this intentionally or not. I like to think he really wanted my opinion. It doesn’t matter. It made for one of those experiences you write home about (or write on your blog about).

The psychological principle of status changed my life in 1980.

It can change yours today.

Listen and learn.

Ao Akua,

Joe
www.mrfire.com

PS – Jimmy Caan also did one other thing that impressed me. Some day I may write about it, too.

PPS — The prize-winning play I wrote and saw produced back in 1979 (mentioned above) was a respectful comedy about eccentric author and playwright William Saroyan. I to this day regret never meeting him. I was actually on my way to California to see him when I grew roots in Texas and paused my travels. He deeply influenced my writing style. He was truly a daring young man in the literary world. I miss him. http://www.kirjasto.sci.fi/saroyan.htm

T.R. Goodman of www.procampsports.com is the fitness trainer to celebrities, professional star athletes, entire sports teams (mostly hockey), and…me.

He teaches an advanced fitness model that is more focused on health and longevity, where the average trainer just focuses on how you look. (You can look great but be ill inside your body. Total fitness is an inside-out achievement. Me, I want to live forever, and look good doing so.)

T.R. looks like a shorter version of actor Tom Selleck. He walks like a panther ready to take on six guys and Jackie Chan them into the ground. And he has a heart as big as Texas. That’s him buying me lunch in Venice, CA, right after another work-out in Gold’s Gym.

He has access to superstar actor James Caan and got me on the set of the hit TV show Las Vegas. While the set was dark, as they weren’t shooting in the studio that day, you can see Jimmy and me standing together on location, in his office on the show.

Jimmy himself took me to the set, driving me there on a little golf cart used to get around the studio lot.

He jokingly told me, “I usually only do these private tours for chicks.”

Truth is, he virtually never gives personal tours.

Afterwards we went back to his trailer. That’s his Bentley (which I want) parked beside it.

Inside the trailer I handed Jimmy a copy of my book, The Attractor Factor.

T.R. took pictures while I quickly told James Caan about the book. I can almost guarantee he’ll never read it, as he didn’t seem to connect to the book, but he said, “I should give this to my wife.”

I noticed something interesting taking place while I hung out with Jimmy in his trailer.

He was far more distracted than he was when I first saw him in the gym that same morning. (See my earlier post: Part One.)

I know he had just done some shooting on location elsewhere, he had just gotten back to his trailer, and he had more than a few things on his mind. It was natural that he couldn’t be as talkative or charming with me as he was earlier in the day. I’m grateful that he spent any time with me, considering who he is in the world.

Still, I noticed something that we can all learn from. Let me back up for a second and explain…

Well, on second thought, it might be better to let my observation be Part Three in this “What I Learned from James Caan” series.

So tune in tomorrow when I finish what I’ve started here.

Truth is, I need to gather my thoughts about how to reveal this to you, anyway.

This is an advanced psychological concept that may take some thought to explain.

So check back here tomorrow.

Ok?

Ao Akua,

Joe
www.mrfire.com

PS – While in LA I also met with sports hypnotherapist Pete Siegel, who I wrote about in an earlier post. I don’t think I’ve ever met a more self-confident man in my life. He’s a blend of an ancient warrior, street-smart no-nonsense results-only do-it-or-die trainer, and a mad genius in the body of a power lifting grizzly bear. I’ll try to find time to write about meeting him, as well. You’ll never forget it, either. His site is at http://www.incrediblechange.com/

PPS — Remember the Hawaiian shaman therapist who healed an entire ward of mentally ill criminals– without seeing any of them? (I wrote about him on an earlier blog post, too. See http://mrfire.blogspot.com/2005/11/living-bliss-or-my-awakening-at-hands.html) He’s planning to come to Texas and would love to give a short talk about his work. If you’re in the Austin area and might be interested, check back here later for more details, or sign up for my ezine at www.mrfire.com I’ll be sending out the details to my list when I know more. Expect miracles.

I just received this picture and the story behind it.

Turns out Jessica Biel, star of the hit TV series Seventh Heaven, used my book, The Attractor Factor, to land a movie role.

She’s obviously holding the book. She says she loves it.

The new movie she’s in is described at http://festival.sundance.org/filmguide/popup.aspx?film=6590

I just returned from LA, saw this, and had to tell you about it.

Ao Akua,

Joe

www.mrfire.com

PS — I’ll post Part Two of my meeting with James Caan tomorrow or the next day. You’ll be astonished by what I describe. I’m hesitant to reveal what took place, but I’m going to take a deep breath and just do it. Stay tuned.

This morning I met actor James Caan at Gold’s Gym here in Venice.

He’s the mega-star of numerous movies, of course, from The Godfather to Misery to Rollerball. And’s he’s in the weekly TV show Las Vegas.

I was in the gym, getting a nutritional assessment done, when someone tapped me on the shoulder.

I jumped up, turned around, and was facing the legend himself.

My first response was to act like a bug-eyed fan too tongue-tied to say anything but smirk and beam like an idiot.

But Jimmy — as he likes to be called — is about as down to earth as they get. He’s got a tough-as-nails exterior, a charming street-smart playful sense of humor, and an open heart.

He saw I was drinking a bottle of Muscle Milk, grabbed it and said, “What’s this shit here? Muscle Milk? The guys around here won’t let you have anything with the word muscle in it.”

At that point I was at ease with James Caan as I was with anyone. I started to get in the spirit of things and playfully said, “I’m not here to grow muscles. I was told they could help me grow hair.”

Jimmy said, “Yea, they helped me grow one or two hairs over the years.”

Outside of Gold’s Gym, in front of Jimmy’s Bentley, our trainer T.R. Goodman took our picture.

Jimmy said, “This is gonna cost you big bucks, Joe.”

“I left my wallet in my room,” I said.

James Caan turned to T.R. Goodman and jokingly said, “Why do you keep bringing me people who forget their wallets? I’m tired of this shit.”

Jimmy started to get in his Bentley www.bentleymotors.com but stopped and said to me, “Joe, if you want to see some lousy writing, come to the set. These guys write like they’re still in kindergarten.”

“You talking about your Las Vegas TV show?”

“Yea, that’s all I do anymore is the Vegas stuff. They need your help, I’m telling ya.”

Jimmy got in his black stallion and drove off. But I would see him again later. He even asked my opinion about a new reality TV show he’s part of — something brutal yet inspiring — and he amazed me by listening to my answer.

Stay tuned for more updates…Including Jimmy’s reaction when I gave him a copy of my book, The Attractor Factor…and including a personal tour of the set of Las Vegas.

Onwards,

Joe

www.mrfire.com

PS — I asked James Caan to sign a photo to me. He said, “What? A signed photo? Are you gay or what?” He got a picture and wrote, “To Joe, you’re the biggest pain in the ass.” Gotta love him.

This morning I met Ray Liotta, the intense actor of Cop Land and Goodfellas and Field of Dreams.

We both have the same personal trainer, TR Goodman. I’m visiting in LA, going to the famous mecca of bodybuilding in Venice: Gold’s Gym. Ray works out five days a week. I caught him this morning as he was doing crunches on top of a big ball. Though he was winded, he took time to shake my hand and smile. I love a celebrity who still acknowledges the common person.

I’m hoping to meet him again tomorrow and, if he doesn’t mind, have a picture with him.

Back in the gym, the place was packed with people, all friendly, all focused on improving their bodies. It was an inspiring sight.

I didn’t pay too much attention to the people there, but for a moment I caught a gorgeous blonde walking by me. I quickly turned back to TR and the equipment he was showing me. I wanted to stay focused and not get distracted.

Imagine my surprise when this hottie says, “Hi Joe!”

I knew this was a mistake.

I’m in LA.

I’m in Gold’s Gym.

Nobody knows me here.

I look at my shirt to see if my name was on it.

Then I look behind me to see if there was another Joe in the room.

And then I look back at the blonde, who’s still smiling at me.

TR says, “You know Ali, don’t you Joe?”

I take another look at this mysterious charmer and then it hits me — It’s The E-zine Queen, Alexandria Brown. www.ezinequeen.com

I ran over, hugged her, and chatted for a second.

It’s true: You never know who you might meet in La.

Or in a gym.

But let’s talk about Harry Potter.

He’s no doubt mad at me again.

My new podcast went from obscurity to #3 on Pocast Alley.

If this keeps up, I may beat him just like I did last April, when my book The Attractor Factor, became number one twice.

When will Potter ever learn?

Marketing is always more powerful than magic.

And I do both.

Joe
www.mrfire.com

PS — I’m supposed to meet actor James Caan tomorrow. I’m excited!

PPS — My podcast is now #1 — It beat Harry Potter!!! I’ll post a new audio on it tonight, thanks to my friend Mark Ryan, who called me earlier. Take THAT, Potter!