Dr. Joe Vitale’s Blog

When I drove Mandy Evans back to the airport, she asked me an interesting question:

“Have you always encouraged people?”

She had spent four days with me and observed me encouraging complete strangers to go for their dreams.

There was an author at a booth and I bought his book and advised him on how to market it.

There was a waitress struggling to get to all her tables and I tipped her more than the bill to encourage her to have a great day.

There was the newbie restaurant owners that I encouraged by designing and distributing an insert ad to tell the locals about their great food.

There was of course Diane Watson, who is now The Property Hugger.

So Mandy wanted to know if I was always encouraging of others.

“No,” I instantly replied. “When I was younger I was angry at the world and didn’t encourage anybody. I was into survival and focused on trying to write, get published, and just generally survive.”

I knew what question was coming next, and I knew I didn’t have a quick answer for it.

“Then when did you start encouraging people?”

I thought for a long time. I honestly couldn’t come up with an answer by the time I dropped off Mandy at the terminal.

But I’ve been chewing on it ever since.

I told Nerissa about the question. As I free associated an answer, she said she heard the word “love” used a lot.

“Love is part of why I do it,” I said. “I love seeing a person come alive with the passion they secretly want to express. But I also know that when you love a person with total acceptance, they feel free to become whatever they desire.”

But I still couldn’t pin-point the time when I began to do this encouraging on a regular basis.

Pat O’Bryan and I had dinner one night and I told him the above story. He then began to probe, trying to get me to narrow down the year and possibly the event that caused me to become encouraging of others.

“I remember reading books that awakened me to the idea that if we focus on the good, we’ll get more good,” I explained.

Marva Collins is a school teacher in Chicago who taught me, through the stories and books by and about her, that when you focus on the positive in a person, and nurtured and encouraged them, they would blossom.

Marva took inner city kids that were considered retarded, special, and/or illiterate and transformed them within months into kids who read Shakespeare and tested at grade levels five times higher than kids of the same age.

Decades ago I was teaching adult education classes in Houston for a company called Leisure Learning. I would try the Marva Collins approach in my classes. I marvelled to see people get excited, take action, and go on to write and publish their own books. They needed encouraged, not just informed.

Pat listened intently as I went on to explain that I also studied Win Wenger, the creativity genius who teaches people how to raise their IQ with simple exercises he created.

Win taught me that whatever you focus on expands. This was long before the movie The Secret or before the Law of Attraction hit mainstream media. Win called it the first law of psychology.

Whatever you focus on will expand.

“It didn’t take long for me to begin using these methods on myself,” I told Pat. “I’d encourage myself and focus on what I wanted. As it worked for me, I realized it would work for others. So I started encouraging people.”

I was also lucky enough to have been married to a woman who was supportive of every idea I came up with, even when we were broke and taking risks could have been seen as a bad move. But Marian focused on the good in me, saw potential, and watered it with her love.

Over time it became easier to encourage people because it felt good, I saw results, and people loved it. So few of us get support that when we suddenly have it, we drink it up like a starving person in the desert.

I’ve taught my Miracles Coaches this same general idea. It’s the prime directive of my life: Find the spark in a person and encourage it to come out in full glory.

Find the spark in a person and encourage it to come out in full glory.

During the meal, the waitress came to Pat and I and asked what we needed. Neither of us needed a thing. We were in the moment. We were happy. But I decided to ask what she needed.

“Nothing,” she said. “One day I want to open my own restaurant but right now I’m just waiting tables.”

Pat and I exchanged glances and he winked. He knew this was my opening. I turned to the waitress and began to encourage her to do something, anything, to make her dream come true.

I have no idea if she’ll actually do anything, but she smiled big and thanked me for the encouragement.

In your own case, as you sit there and read these words, you might ask who is encouraging you and who are you encouraging?

Who are you encouraging?

If you want encouragement, consider my Miracles Coaching program. There’s nothing like constant support and encouragement to achieve your goals and intentions.

If you want to encourage others, begin right now. Listen, really listen, when people talk to you. You’ll often hear their secret wish. When you hear it, focus on it, if only for a moment.

It’s how dreams come true.

Ao Akua,

Joe
www.mrfire.com

PS — I thank Mandy for asking her great question. I still don’t know exactly when I started to encourage people, but I’d guess around 1982. Yet Mandy’s question led to some deep self-reflection, some deep conversations, and to this blog post. If you liked it, please share it with others. Who knows, you just might encourage someone to dare something worthy. 

Note: Pat O’Bryan interviewed me about this topic last night for his weekly online TV show. It was recorded and you can view it at www.portableempire.tv/ Simply look for the 6-17-08 show with me. Then click on it. Enjoy.

  Dan Kennedy is my favorite living marketer.

He’s a grumpy guy with a negative attitude about many things, but he also has a surprising sense of humor, a hypnotic writing style, and a marketing genius brain.

I studied and still study his books and courses on copywriting, advertising, direct marketing, speaking, writing, management, marketing, and no BS this and no BS that. I soak up everything he writes and says.

When his monthly gold newsletter arrives, I drop everything and read it. In fact, I always look to see if he has anything new for me to buy, and I’m disappointed if there isn’t an ad insert for a new product of his.

That’s how much I respect Dan Kennedy.

So you might imagine my surprise when he asked me to write the foreword to his latest book, No B.S. Marketing to the Affluent.

I was stunned, delighted, and so honored that I spent three days writing and rewriting my foreword for him.

I chiseled the thing into perfection. I felt like Michelangelo must have felt smoothing marble into David.

Dan loved my foreword. It’s called “How to Easily Attract the Affluent.” I’m proud to say it’s mentioned on the cover of his new book — a book you can get at book stores right now, or from Amazon, of course.

More than that, in the back of Dan’s new book he has me listed as a resource. In the section for www.joevitale.com he says,

“Vitale is a true marketing, sales and promotion genius.”

You know I loved that. 🙂

But forget about me and my foreword.

Dan’s latest book is a masterpiece. There are so many tips and insights and practical suggestions on how to make money marketing to the affluent, that I wouldn’t know where to begin.

The book’s under twenty bucks, which I think is a ridiculous steal.

My only complaint about Dan’s new book is that he didn’t autograph it to me.

Go get it.

Ao Akua,

Joe
www.mrfire.com

PS — If you’re at all interested in marketing, you must be reading books by Dan Kennedy. There’s just no two ways around it. See www.dankennedy.com or just go to www.amazon.com and buy every book by him. NOW.

 Diane Watson moved from Pennsylvania to Texas when her husband transferred to a new job. 

She became depressed.

She didn’t know anyone. Didn’t have a job. Missed her family and friends and familiar surroundings.

She found my book The Attractor Factor, read it, applied it, and began to do things that made her happy.

She smiled more. She became a realtor. She made friends.

And then she discovered that the author of The Attractor Factor lived down the street from her.

You might imagine her surprise.

She wanted to meet me but was nervous. She saw my bright yellow Steven Tyler Panoz AIV Roadster outside a coffee shop and knew I was inside. She got out of her car, took a picture of my car, and left.

She saw me walking to my mail box one day as she drove past, and instead of saying hello, she ducked behind the steering wheel and stepped on the gas.

She wrote me a long letter, sent it by snail mail to me, and I read it and replied to it. But she never wrote back.

We finally met at a party. I liked her instantly and we arranged to have lunch.

Over lunch Nerissa and I learned she was a realtor. We told her our plans for a green mansion. Diane took on the project. She’s been helping us find the right property ever since.

But something else happened at that lunch.

Diane told me she had been studying my marketing material, too, and loved my book on P.T. Barnum, There’s a Customer Born Every Minute.

She told us she had a dream of opening a site that would be a one-stop clearing spot for people wanting to buy or sale land or homes anywhere in the country.

But she wasn’t sure if it was a good idea, or if she could do it.

I saw the diamond in the rough and encouraged her to take action.

“But where do I start?” she protested. “There are rules and regulations for each state. And I don’t know how to make a website. Or how to get traffic to it. Or what to call the site. Or –”

Her list of objections went on and on.

Both Nerissa and myself encouraged Diane to start now, and to start with something. As she took action, I explained, the next steps would become clear.

I wasn’t sure if Diane would take action or not. I hoped she would. But you never know what people will do. Will they step forward, or step back? It’s up to them.

Well, the other night Diane came by to pick us up in her new car (which she says she attracted with my attract a new car program) and with new business cards proudly displaying her new website: www.propertyhugger.com

She is going for it.

This is how dreams become realities: you start with whatever you can do, learn what you need to know for the next steps, and just keep moving forward.

It helps to have encouragement, of course. That’s why I have a Miracles Coaching program. But maybe you, like Diane, don’t need it. (Actually, Diane had me has her neighborhood Miracles Coach.)

Whatever the case, begin and begin now.

Go for your dreams.

Ao Akua,

Joe
www.mrfire.com

PS — In my next post I’ll answer the question, “When did I start encouraging people, and why?” It’s an eye-opener.

 Mandy Evans is the first Miracles Coach. She knew me when I was poor and desperate, and helped me. She knew me when I was unpublished and struggling, and encouraged me. She knew me when my wife died, and helped heal me. She recently came to visit me, and we had a blast. Her version of the story is on her blog here http://beliefbreakout.blogspot.com/2008/06/best-thing-about-abundance.html And you can see me interacting with her on a short video clip here www.youtube.com/watch?v=9v8nM2PAacw or by clicking the below image. Don’t bother trying to hire her, though, as she’s retired from miracles coaching. That’s why I set up www.miraclescoaching.com You can get her books at Amazon or off her site www.mandyevans.com Enjoy. 🙂

I wrote one of the first books on Internet marketing long, long ago. It was called CyberWriting. It became a quick bestseller due to one secret – a secret revealed in the following brief video clip. At the recent World Wellness event in Austin, I met a comedy writer who once worked for one of the greatest magicians of all time. Click the below image to see it (or go to www.youtube.com/watch?v=w3ayqloL1YA) and learn about magic, marketing, and more, as my co-author (of Inspired Marketing) Craig Perrine looks on.