Dr. Joe Vitale’s Blog
How to Treat People
A reader watched my DVD, Humbug, and emailed me this question:
“Was there one point in your life that was the turn around? I often ask people who’ve obviously hitched themselves to a Saturn 5 rocket the same question.”
I get that question a lot.
I’ve been thinking about it long and hard.
I know that taking on the attitude that anything is possible is part of the answer. So is knowing the Law of Attraction and the idea that getting clear leads to preferred results. So is always saying yes to life. And so is the idea of being ruthlessly honest about your desires.
But those are mindsets I’ve developed over time. They don’t answer the question about the single event that changed my life.
The thing is, there’s no “one point” where everything shifted for me. It was more a series of defining moments, some more memorable than others. For example:
Landing the book deal to write The AMA Complete Guide to Small Business Advertising for the American Marketing Association back in 1993, was a marker for me. I wasn’t paid much money (almost none) but it was my first book deal with a traditional publisher and the project made me feel accomplished and important. It also got me more clients and more speaking engagements. (I still love the book and use it myself, though sadly it’s now out of print. Some of it ended up in my book, Hypnotic Writing .)
Recording my program, The Power of Outrageous Marketing for Nightingale-Conant in 1997, was another turning point for me, one I had longed to have for over ten years. People who knew that company and their wonderful products began to treat me like I was a deity in the marketing world. That also influenced my own sense of value. (That’s also when I raised my fees. ) The program still sells like crazy today, and I’m still very proud of it. (One of my favorite sections is where I stage an interview with the great circus showman and master marketer, P.T. Barnum.)
Certain people helped me step up to a new level, as well.
Paul Hartunian changed my life. This publicity genius who once sold the Brooklyn Bridge as a PR stunt and got on Johnny Carson for it, once spent three hours over dinner in Houston telling me how to change my business. I took notes. I acted. Paul’s giving was a defining moment in my career. I’ll never forget him. He’s one of my heros.
Mandy Evans has been a “miracles coach” in my life for more than twenty years. This wonderful author of such books as Travelling Free has always been only a phone call away. Whenever I feel stuck and ready for the next level, I call her. I love her. She helps me get clear .
Bob Proctor — a living legend in the self-help movement — changed my life when he politely nudged me to publish the little book I was fearful about releasing, Spiritual Marketing. That book became an Amazon bestseller twice, got me into The New York Times, and led to my rewriting it and seeing J. Wiley publish it as the now long running classic, The Attractor Factor. And of course that book got me into the movie The Secret, which led to my being on Larry King, eXtra TV, CNN, CNBC, ABC, Time, Newsweek and…well, you get the idea.
Obviously, there’s no one event that transformed me.
If you want to know more, I’ve written about my journey through life in such books as Adventures Within. It reveals other defining moments and the people who triggered them for me.
I really wish there was a simple answer to the question of what was my turning point moment, so we could both learn from it. But what may be better is to assume every moment is your turn around one, and act from that perspective. Life would then take on a glow .
Backed into a corner, and forced to say something was the one thing that changed my career, I’d give credit to the Internet.
I began as an Internet skeptic in the early 1990s. I didn’t believe all the hype about gold in cyberspace.
I was wrong.
I later wrote one of the first books about online marketing (CyberWriting).
And later, when Mark Joyner urged me to let him release my first e-book (Hypnotic Writing ), I began to taste fame and fortune.
So I have to give credit to being active online as a turning point in my career. (Note I said active online. I was and am busy creating and promoting products, not waiting for the world to come to my door.) The Internet let me take what I was doing locally and distribute it to the world.
But, as you can see, it was one of many defining moments.
Maybe the best way to wrap this up is with the following story:
I’m hearing from people from my past who saw the movie The Secret and then searched for me online. When they get to my main site , they write me and ask something like, “Are you the same Joe Vitale I worked with thirty years ago?”
One gent did that a while back. Turns out we had worked at Exxon together long, long ago.
He saw me on Larry King and couldn’t believe my level of success. He wrote to me saying, “I wish I had known what a gem I was hanging around back then.”
I thought, what if each of us treated each other like we were gems already — just unrecognized and maybe unpolished.
Wouldn’t that single change of perspective make every moment of our lives a turning point?
As Goethe wrote, “Treat people as if they were what they ought to be, and you help them become what they are capable of being.”
Ao Akua ,
Joe
PS — A way to get a turning point moment for yourself is through Miracles Coaching. I believe that trained mentors can help you leap to the next level, and I still employ them for myself today. Expect miracles. And remember, every moment counts.
About Miracles Coaching
You can can get a quick, brief overview of Miracles Coaching by watching the below clip. Enjoy.
Attracting Ray Bradbury
Sci-fi writer Ray Bradbury (The Martian Chronicles, The Illustrated Man, etc) has been another one of my inspirations. I met him decades ago. His 1992 book, Zen in the Art of Writing, inspired me as a writer. Lately I’ve been attracting signed copies of his books to add to my collection. I love the man’s zest for life, which is what he says is a secret to great writing.
As I’ve been reacquainting myself with Bradbury, I went to his official site and watched some of the recent videos of him. One showed his library in his basement. It reminded me of my own vault of books. There were first editions of many authors who had influenced him.
It got me thinking. Just as Jules Verne influenced Bradbury, and Bradbury influenced me, virtually every successful person has been inspired/influenced by someone before them.
It’s another way to get coaching. I’m a firm believer that without coaching, you don’t grow very fast or go very far. Oh, you can still succeed, but it’s tougher. I think you need to find a role model in your field and aspire to their greatness.
Gene Landrum, one of my favorite psychological business writers (The Superman Syndrome, Power and Paronoia, etc), says all the greats do this. He points out that Oprah pretended to be Barbara Walters. In the beginning, I pretended to be Jack London, or Rod Serling, or Robert Collier, or William Saroyan, or Ray Bradbury. This psychological technique helped tease out my latent talents. As they grew, I integrated them all and became the author you read today.
If you want to attract success and break through your barriers and blocks, get a coach and get a hero.
Ray Bradbury is one of mine.
Ao Akua,
PS — You can still read my latest book, Attract Money Now, online for free by clicking the below banner:
The "59 Seconds" Self Help Book
When ABC News interviewed me for their upcoming show on the pros and cons of positive thinking and the Law of Attraction, one of their questions was, “Why are there so many self-help books?”
Apparently a published skeptic felt that if self-help books really worked, we wouldn’t need so many of them.
Does that make sense to you?
Consider —
With all the cookbooks in the world, there will always be more published, guaranteed. With all the books on psychology, or sales, or aviation, or pottery, or martial arts, or law, or religion, or marketing, or sports, or politics, or parenting, or skepticism, or – well, name any category – there will always be more books.
That doesn’t mean there’s a problem with the books already published. It doesn’t mean there’s a problem with the fields themselves, either. It means people are still growing and learning, discovering and sharing.
But somehow with self-help, it’s not accepted.
I find that odd.
I’ve spent most of the day reading Richard Wiseman’s book, 59 Seconds: Think a Little, Change a Lot. It’s mis-titled, as you can’t read much of it in 59 seconds. Still, it’s an excellent book. It’s research-based self-help. It’s packed with study after study proving or disproving concepts taught in the self-help movement. You should read it.
Side note: It’s interesting that scientific studies in the filed of psychology don’t usually come to any definitive conclusions. In other words, the studies indicate results may “suggest” a particular pattern or insight, but they don’t guarantee it. Even the so-called Law of Reciprocity can’t be guaranteed to work all the time. When you give something to someone, it’s no guarantee they’ll give you anything in return. Still, authors call it a “law” when they don’t allow any leeway for the Law of Attraction. In short, read the psychological studies as entertainment but test their conclusions in your own life. After all, a different study done with a different audience may indicate a different result. Or so it appears to suggest.
But isn’t 59 Seconds yet another self-help book?
Since it has the blessing of science behind it, it tends to be “allowed” as a self-help book, even by the skeptics.
Do you see the illogical nature of this?
I love self-help and success literature. If it weren’t for those books, and my taking action on what I read, I’d still be unknown, unpublished and unhappy.
One night I watched a documentary on happiness. An author being interviewed (I don’t recall his name) said over 70% of the people who change on their own, without therapy or a coach, do so because of a self-help book.
When celebrity fitness model Jennifer Nicole Lee visited me for the Rolls-Royce Phantom Mastermind (which ABC News filmed) she asked me, “How did you get into self-help?”
I replied, “Because I needed help.”
I told ABC News that neither I nor any self-help author I know set out to write more than one book on self-help. It’s the readers who ask for them. It’s the market that demands more. We simply supply what they request.
When I wrote The Attractor Factor, I never considered I’d write The Key or Zero Limits after it. Neither was in my mind.
And lord knows I never intended to write my recent book, Attract Money Now. That came as a result of my seeing so many people struggling. I even decided to give the digital version of the book away, for free, to help them.
I’m proud to be a self-help author. I don’t plan to write any more books, but I never thought I’d be the author of fifty books, either. (Yes, fifty.)
The point: When you need help, consider books. Yes, there are plenty to choose from. But that’s why restaurants have more than one special. Each person is different. Each desires and feels best with a particular approach.
Books that have helped me include —
The Magic of Believing
Think and Grow Rich
How to Win Friends and Influence People
Why Is This Happening to Me…Again?
The Dark Side of the Light Chasers
What self-help books have made a difference in your life?
Leave a comment and let me know.
Ao Akua,
PS – Studies suggest that if you read my new book, Attract Money Now, you’ll learn how to use the Law of Attraction to attract something you might need in your life: money.
How to Let Go
I received this email and liked it so much I asked permission to share it with you. It helps answer how to use the law of attraction to get what you want while still finding a way to let go and be detached of the outcome. Note: The program he refers to in his email is my audioprogram called The Missing Secret.
