Tag: optimism
Mind Poop
You’ve probably heard the phrase, “He’ll get over it.”
It’s usually said after someone has been hurt by a statement. The person who said it will rationalize, “They’ll get over it.”
But will they?
For decades now, I’ve been doing my best to encourage people to go for their dreams. When someone says they have a desire to do something — whether enter a contest or work toward a degree or open a business or write a book — my general default setting is to urge them on.
After all, neither you or I can predict the future of anyone’s success or failure. It makes far more sense to me to be optimistic and urge them to go for it.
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So you can imagine my shock when I hear people put their own family and friends down, or dissuade their dreams. It seems like the most unloving thing to do.
Yet they do it.
Why?
I know some people rationalize their own behavior with statements like, “I was just being honest” or “He needs to face reality” or the infamous “She’ll get over it.”
But are any of those statements actually true?
My bet is this: the people saying the negative, limiting, degrading or harmful statements have convinced themselves they are doing it for the good of others, when in fact they are doing it to stroke their own egos.
Why would anybody do any of this?
It’s unconscious programming.
It’s ego.
"Criticism is an indirect form of self-boasting." -Emmet Fox
No one that I know purposely wants to hurt anyone, but they still do it, not knowing they are and somehow convincing themselves otherwise.
I think it’s time to awaken.
When a flower wants to bloom, water it.
Language is so revealing. When someone says, “I like your ideas. I’ll see if I can find your books,” they are actually never going to read the books.
How do I know?
The wimpy phrase “I’ll see if” signals they aren’t committed.
When someone says, “I’ll try that,” they most likely will never try it.
Why?
Saying “I’ll try” doesn’t have any commitment.
When someone says, “I have to be honest with you,” they are often actually saying they are going to hurt you but they are hiding their dagger behind the word “honest.”
In reality, there is honesty that helps, and honesty that hurts.
Any statement can be phrased to be soft and loving, or hard and unloving. There’s always a choice.
And so it goes.
Here’s what I suggest:
Really be on alert to the language people use when speaking to you. When someone signals they are about to hurt you or your dreams, brace yourself, run away, defend yourself, or escape. These are the people who convinced themselves they are doing this “for your own good” and if they hurt you in the process, “you’ll get over it.”
“Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain but it takes character and self control to be understanding and forgiving.” -Dale Carnegie
Be on alert to your own language, too. Pay attention to your use of wimpy phrases that reveal lack of commitment or true desire. What you speak reflects what you think, and generally comes about.
A friend once told me, “If a person came into your home, dropped their pants, and took a dump on your floor, you’d have a fit. You wouldn’t allow it. Yet that’s exactly what people do when they say negative things: They crap in your head!”
In other words, we have to watch out for crappy language.
People raining on your parade are pooping in your head. Don’t allow it.
When you say something negative or unsporting to yourself, you are pooping in your own head. Don’t do it.
This post is a reminder to watch where you poop.
Ao Akua,
joe
PS — I’m not dismissing helpful advice that you seek out, and that comes from people successful in the field you are asking about. In other words, if you’re seeking wealth insights, ask a wealthy person. If you’re seeking dating advice, ask a dating expert with a track record for success. But people just randomly stating their negative opinions, coming from no experience in your desired dream, are probably a waste of time. Don’t let them poop in your head.
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The Miracles Manual
You can now download and read — for free — my latest e-book, The Miracles Manual: The Secret Coaching Sessions. Just go to http://www.miraclesmanual.com/
This 258-page new e-book contains questions from students in my Miracles Coaching program, and my answers. I’ve been doing this for about four years, and I’m always amazed at the in-depth and sincere questions I get.
For example —
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* How do you get past fears and negativity?
* How can I turn my spouse around from being so negative?
* How do you handle difficult people?
* How do you make changes directly from the conscious into the unconscious?
* How do you get rid of a block in yourself you can’t even name?
* What is and why is Ho’oponopono so effective?
* What about when it doesn’t work?
* What do you do when all the self-help methods aren’t working?
* How do you move up a level in life to meet new people?
* What is “benestrophe”?
* How do you go from a scarcity mindset to a abundance mindset?
* What can you do to improve your health fast?
* How can you attract a specific person into your life?
* How do you attract your soul mate?
* How do you really attract money?
* How are miracles made?
Great questions, aren’t they?
Over the last few years, I gave the answers to those questions (and many more) in secret coaching sessions I held with students in my Miracles Coaching program.
Many of the best questions, and answers, are now in volume one of a 258-page new ebook called The Miracles Manual: The Secret Coaching Sessions.
It’s pretty eye-opening.
And you can have it.
Free.
I want to help as many people as I can, and I figure giving away this book is another way to do it.
Go here to get the eBook — http://www.miraclesmanual.com/
Expect Miracles!
Ao Akua,
Joe
PS — Please tell others about the The Miracles Manual. Just click on the “Share” link below this sentence. Thank you.
How to Win the Lottery
A woman sitting beside me on a flight recognized me from my Law of Attraction books and movie appearances and said, “Joe, I keep trying to use that stuff to win the lotto but it just isn’t happening.”
I figured we were seated together for a reason, and took this as my opportunity to offer some help.
“You know why you haven’t won the lotto?” I asked.
“I need to buy the winning ticket?”
“Well, there’s that,” I said. “But most people are insisting that the money they want come in one way: from the lottery.”
“Yea, that’s me,” she said.
“If you don’t mind my being blunt, that’s small thinking and closed minded thinking, ” I explained. “The Universe is bigger and smarter and far more resourceful than that. You don’t need to win the lottery to get the money you want. You need to be open to it coming to you in any number of other ways.”
She seemed to reflect on what I said. She commented, “I never thought of it that way.”
“You don’t really want to win the lottery,” I said. “What you really want is the money. The lotto is just one way it might come to you. Focus on what you want, not on how you will attract it.”
She really seemed to enjoy this discussion, so I proceeded.
“And if you want to go deeper into this, you don’t really even want the money,” I said.
That startled her.
“I don’t?”
“No, you want what the money will get you. The money is a means to an end. What you really need to do is focus on what you want, not on the money. The money is a tool or a vehicle. It’s just one way you can have what you really want.”
I paused as she reflected on what I just said.
When I spoke at the Hay House event in Austin recently, I told the 2,000 people in attendance that as soon as they appreciated where they were and what they had in life right now, the faster they could speed up their ability to attract what they wanted.
In other words, it’s the underlying sense of urgency that keeps most of what you want away. The signal you are sending out is one of desperation or demand, which the Universe will respond to by matching.
Do you really want more desperation, demand, impatience or dissatisfaction?
I doubt it.
As I explained to the woman on the plane, most people are insisting that things happen a certain way, not realizing that that approach is based on what the ego considers possible. Yet the “Universe of all possibilities” can surprise you by bringing you what you want in a fresh way.
So declare what you really want, appreciate what you already have, be looking for the opportunities, and take action when you see them
That’s where miracles begin.
And it just might include winning the lottery — or something even better.
Ao Akua,
Joe
PS — To more deeply understand all of this thinking, be sure to get your own free copy of my e-book, Attract Money Now. Just click this link —
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Transformation On Demand
How do you transform?
How do you make such a dramatic change in your life that the new you is clearly different than the old you?
How long does it take?
Is it even possible?
Some people have to hit bottom before they change. Some never do. Others do it spontaneously. Still others do it intentionally.
I’m interested in the last group; those wonderful souls who choose to transform. If you’ve been wanting to make a change in your life, this subject might interest you, too. So let’s explore it.
Three weeks ago today I completed the Bill Phillips Transformation weekend. It’s a three day kick start on a twelve week program to transform your life, focusing on your health. I love the program, have already had dramatic results, and see principles in it that you can use to transform your life in any area.
Let’s talk about it…
Bill Phillips and wife Maria
I’ve been a fan of Bill Phillips since he started the famous Body For Life fitness contests back in 1996. I entered and completed five of them in a row back in 2004 and 2005. It took discipline and commitment and I gave it my all.
I lost 80 pounds, received five certificates of completion, and won an honorable mention for my success. I’m still proud of those five certificates of achievement. I’ve showed them off to everyone who visits my gym, including actor/bodybuilder Lou Ferrigno.
The Great Lou Ferrigno in my gym
When I met Bill Phillips the first time years ago, I told him how he influenced my life. He flattered me by saying he had studied my marketing materials and that I had influenced him, too. It was an unforgettable moment for me.
My Certificates of Achievement for completing five consecutive Body for Life contests in 2004 and 2005
But that was almost ten years ago. Bill Phillips moved on. I grew older. I lost touch with him and his wisdom. As I approached the age of 60, and felt my body age and my waist line grow, I wanted his help again.
I had tried low cal, no cal, low carb, no carb, high protein, veggie, juice, HCG, cabbage, low Glycemic, blood type, kitten food (kidding) and other diets. They all work in the short term.
But as Bill Phillips says, dieting is like holding your breath. When you come up for air, you’ll devour everything in sight.
Been there.
Not good.
Or healthy.
I knew you had to change the inside before your outside would change. After all, that’s the core of my message these days. For that reason, I’ve gone through a long list of self help processes, including personal work with the amazing Morty Lefkoe.
And now I wanted and was ready for the complete package. I wanted the dramatic and long term results I had gotten on the Body for Life program, only with any updates in transformation since those days long ago.
So I did the only logical thing: I Googled Bill Phillips.
Bill Phillips showing you can eat well (here devouring a turkey burger) and still be fit
Turns out Bill is doing great, looking great, and still inspiring others through something he calls Transformation Camp and the Transformation Challenge. It didn’t take me long to decide to register for his three day weekend and be trained personally by him.
Bill trained Clint Eastwood, Sly Stalone, Whoopie Goldberg, the Denver Broncos and other celebrities and athletes. Having the chance to train with him personally would be worth whatever the investment. I’ve met movie stars and super stars and worked out with their celebrity fitness trainers, but I was more excited about being with Bill than anyone else.
And I wasn’t disappointed.
Bill is warm, wise, relaxed, supportive, inspiring. He loves scientific research and quotes it as easily as others quote sports scores or jokes. He’s also a great storyteller, and openly shares his personal struggles.
For example, Bill had a near death experience when he almost drowned in Hawaii. It shattered his world view. It triggered a quest for him to study esoteric literature and ancient spirituality. He traveled around the world, visited healers and mystics, and probed for the secrets of the universe.
He also fell down the stairs in his home and broke both his legs. That experience caused him to put all his life research and life experience – everything from fitness and spirituality to psychology and metaphysics – into an entirely new program. It’s what he today calls Transformation.
Maria Phillips lost 65 pounds
Bill’s insights are mind opening:
- He said focus on process, not perfection.
- He said he doesn’t care to avoid death, that he instead wants us to live long enough to complete our life mission.
- He said he’s seen dramatic transformation right after people take total self responsibility.
- He said he’s seen 225% better results in achieving goals when people have group support.
- He said lives transform after people experience forgiveness and let go of resentment.
Of course, Bill’s seen these transformations firsthand and been the catalyst for a staggering amount of them. Not a few hundred, but a few hundred thousand.
His earlier book, Body For Life, influenced a million people. His later book, Eating For Life, is still a bestseller. His latest book, Transformation, is picking up where his earlier work left off.
Bill Phillips' latest book
I’m used to Bill’s evidence based approach to proving his methods. I still recall flipping through the pages of his popular magazine from a decade ago, Muscle Media. It was packed with pages and pages of before and after photos of people who had dramatically transformed their bodies and their lives, in only twelve weeks. Bill’s gym in Denver, Colorado also has before/after pictures.
The evidence that change is possible is overwhelming.
Today Bill focuses on a more all encompassing transformation. Health and fitness are still a focus, but not the only ones. He’s less concerned about muscle building and more focused on inner life building. His whole being approach to transformation is about taking control of your entire life, not just what you see in the mirror.
And today Bill is offering it on a smaller scale. Once a month he personally trains, inspires, and guides thirty people in his Transformation Center in Denver. Every weekend camp sells out in advance. Besides the three day intensive, Bill’s team offers ongoing support by email and on Facebook for another twelve weeks.
It’s clear to me that Bill is on a life mission. He doesn’t appear to care about financial reward. He cares about you. And me. He’s donated over two million dollars to the Make-A-Wish Foundation. This is a man who cares about people.
And that’s why I joined his Transformation Camp three weeks ago. I’m going to respect the privacy of the thirty people in the weekend with me and Bill. I’m not going to describe our experiences. They were personal, and my group is now a support team. I love them.
Let’s just say that when I walked in the door for the first day of Transformation, and was met with Bill’s sister making me pancakes, I knew I was in the right place. (They were protein pancakes, tasted delicious, and the recipe is in the book, Eating For Life.)
Bill Phillips and my new book and new music
But let’s go back to the questions I asked about how people change. Since the other questions were answered in this post, let’s just look at the key one: How can you transform?
There are five key steps to transformation:
- A decision. You “demand” transformation by choosing it. Your conscious intent to go in a new direction redirects your life flow and aims you where you want to go. It all begins here.
- A plan. You control circumstances when you are prepared for them. Having information on what to do, how and when, will guide you down the path to transformation.
- A vision. A clear picture of the end result you want will help you attract it into your life. A great way to accelerate that transformation is to step into the end vision and live from it right now, today.
- A why. The more reasons you have for wanting transformation, the better and faster will be the results.
- A support team. When someone believes in you, odds are you will boost your own opinion of yourself. When you are in a group of people who want your transformation as much if not more than you do, you will go in the direction of speedy transformation.
Finally, let’s hear from Bill Phillips —
“No matter who you are, no matter what you do, you absolutely, positively do have the power to change, and no one can take that away.”
The path is clear for you or anyone to begin their own transformation.
It all begins with step one — a decision.
What’s yours?
Ao Akua,
joe
PS — I fully endorse Bill Phillips and his Transformation Challenge. I am not an affiliate for anything he offers, but I fully recommend all of it. For more details, go to http://www.transformation.com/ or send an email to [email protected]
PPS – Here’s a bonus for you. It’s Bill Phillips giving some advice. Enjoy.
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A Request from the Late Debbie Ford
One of the greatest books to influence my life was The Dark Side of the Light Chasers by Debbie Ford.
Not only is the book one of my top ten picks for life changing reads, but the author later became a dear friend of mine.
I’m sad to say she passed away last night.
I am shaken by the loss, as Debbie was a mentor who I loved. She endorsed me and my books, believed in me, and was always a phone call away.
The late Debbie Ford
I loved her.
While Debbie is gone, her message is alive and well through her books.
One of her final wishes was to get more people to read her work, especially the book that opened my eyes so many years ago.
If you haven’t read it, or if you’d like to get copies to give as gifts, please go to — http://shar.es/YQeQB
I am posting this at the request of Debbie, and as a way to support her family (as they get the royalties from sales).
Please live your life with passion, grace and love, just as Debbie Ford did.
Ao Akua,
Joe
PS — A friend recently told me we don’t need to live forever – just long enough to complete our life mission. Debbie completed hers, knew it, and said so. I celebrate her mission successfully accomplished and I’ll always miss her, too.
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