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Since I’ve spent this week recovering from surgery, I’m not doing much but –

* enjoy the pain-numbing narcotics giving me Twilight Zone-like glimpses into life (I’ve had some doozies),

* channel-jump on the TV,

* write a blog post here,

* peck away at a few e-mails, and/or

* read books.

Ah. Reading books. My favorite addiction.

Right now I am surrounded by maybe 150 books. I feel safely walled in from the world. Out of all of these paper bricks of wisdom, one of them has stood out above all the rest.

The book Prank the Monkey by Sir John Hargrave is causing me to need more pain medicine. Every time I read it I start laughing, which causes my stomach to tighten, which causes me to grimace. It’s a love-hate thing. Laughter is good. Pain is bad. The balance is sweet.

Hargrave’s book is well written, lively, fun and insightful. He’s a very human prankster who dares to poke holes at society’s weak spots by pulling fairly mild hoaxes.

His targets are the biggies who get too big to remember being small: Wal-Mart, Starbucks, celebrities, and of course government.

The book is subtitled “The ZUG Book of Pranks.” It’s based on a site I’m now getting to know over at http://www.zug.com/

Since I’m a disciple of P.T. Barnum, and of course wrote a book about Barnum and other hoaxers in There’s A Customer Born Every Minute, I love this book. It’s in the spirit of Alan Abel and the audacious people who aren’t afraid to show us our vulnerabilities in a playful way.

One of the things I love about Hargrave’s book is his humanness. He admits to being nervous when he pulls pranks.

I know the feeling.

When I hired Alan Abel to pull The Great Lotto Hoax (soon to be a movie) to help promote my book, The Attractor Factor, last February, I had several sweaty, sleepless nights full of fear. What if this doesn’t work? What if it back-fires? What if — fill in the bank with any fear you like.

Hargrave is afraid, too, but believes in his mission and goes forth, anyway.

I’m glad he did and does.

Except for convulsions of belly-laughter while reading Prank the Monkey — which in my case is uncomfortable — it’s a healing book.

Ao Akua,

Joe
www.mrfire.com

PS – Mark your calendar: Oprah will air her special on The Secret movie this coming Thursday, Feb. 8 th. I’m not on it – I was on my back in a hospital when it was filmed – but my friends Jack Canfield and James Ray are. Watch it. I bet this show sends the message of The Secret across the planet in a way never seen before. Tell friends. Tune in. Note: This is not a prank.

You may have noticed that the blog post from a few days ago titled “I No Longer Exist” has been changed to “I Am Alive and Well.”

Turns out what I write here is almost like a magic genie: it comes true.

Besides, enough people wrote to me saying they were disturbed or uneasy about the “I No Longer Exist” post to made me realize I was sending out bad vibes.

I apologize.

Please forgive me.

I’ll be careful in the future.

Ao Akua,

Joe
www.mrfire.com

PS – Your words have power, too. It’s your magic genie. Choose your words carefully. Always express what you want, not what you don’t want. We all need reminded of this. Even me.

I’m about to reveal the truth behind the hit TV series 24 starring Kiefer Sutherland as Jack Bauer.

I know where the show is going, and if you’re a fan, this news may come as a shock to you.

On the other hand, this insight might make the show far more entertaining to you.

Still with me?

Here’s the deal:

I’ve been a fan — no, an addict — of 24 since it came out about six years ago. I watched every episode, sometimes holding my breath for nearly a minute as I wondered if a character would live or die. Most of the characters – except Jack Bauer — die, of course.

And that’s a clue.

I’ve even rearranged my schedule so I didn’t do teleseminars or speaking engagements on the nights 24 aired. This was a dumb thing to do from a business standpoint — after all, we do have Tivo — but I wanted to see the shows “real time.”

I’ve also collected all the DVDs, the books, and anything directly related to the show. I’ve felt the show is the most dramatic thing on television in maybe forty years, harking back to the 1960s with the addictive TV show The Fugitive starring David Janssen.

24 is far better, far more intense, and far more gruesome.

And that’s another clue.

So, what’s my big discovery?

In nearly every episode Jack Bauer demonstrates almost superhuman powers. He never stops to pee, drives through a fast food joint to keep his blood sugar level, or takes a nap.

Yet he gets in car accidents, plane accidents, and is repeatedly tortured, and he still walks away.

Now, this is curious.

I just had surgery. The doctor removed my appendix. All things considered, it’s a relatively minor thing. Still, I couldn’t walk after surgery and can barely move around now, three days later.

When Nerissa came to get me at the hospital, it took me forever to bend into her car.

So if Jack is getting beat up and tortured weekly, he must not be human.

And that’s the secret.

Jack Bauer is not human.

I predict that the show will eventually reveal him to be a government cyborg or some sort of advanced Artificial Intelligence Robot.

He might even turn out to be from another planet, but let’s stay “real” here.

You heard it here first.

Ao Akua,

Joe
www.mrfire.com

PS — Truth is, installing violent images of mass destruction in your head is not healthy from a metaphysical view. If you can watch it for entertainment alone, fine. But 24 is designed to dig into your gut. So I’d say it would be hard to resist their programming. Unless, of course, you’re a government cyborg like Jack Bauer.

I hired Panoz artist Larry Gardinier to paint an original one-of-a-kind work of art of my beloved Francine. It arrived today.

I am on my back recovering from an emergency operation.

I’m typing this on my trusty Blackberry, which is about the only thing that didn’t break down on me last weekend.

My main computer quit. My laptop quit. And all of my websites stemming from www.mrfire.com went down.

None of the above were connected in any way at all.

On Monday I went back into the recording studio to complete reading of my book Buying Trances.

But I did it in a lot of pain. By that night the stomach cramps were far worse.

I called my friend who is an M.D. And he sent me to ER. They ran tests and then scheduled me for an appendix removal. They did it too. It was my first ever surgery and first ever hospital stay.

I’m glad to be home.

I’m in pain and can’t move much but all in all, all is well

What I find most interesting about all of this is my own attitude.

I was never angry or frustrated. I was more curious.

I’m reading a book called Choosing Reality. Its a Buddhist view of physics and the mind. I can’t say I understand it but I can say I love my curious view of the bumps in life.

After all, I have much to be grateful for.

My father’s appendix burst when he was ten. He was in the hospital 21 days with three tubes coming out his stomach to drain all the poison.

I am VERY lucky.

Friends sent me emails and amazon gift certificates. Pat O’Bryan even sent a note to his entire list about me.

I am VERY grateful.

No one knows what an appendix is for. Alan Abel once said on a radio show he thought it was a spare penis.

I LOVE humor.

Thank you for your love and support. I should be back online soon.

Ao Akua,

Joe
www.mrfire.com

** Sent via Wireless E-Mail with Blackberry **
(I could be anywhere) 🙂